Weeble's Wobble But I Fall Down

I Have A Love/Hate Relationship With Gravity

I have been in a pool of stagnation for a minute. I seem to be stuck, moving neither right or left, up or down. I recently threw my back out in a big way, barely able to move, and then only with my cane. This wasn’t a new situation due to my having degenerative disc disease, but I thought I had the pain managed for the most part.

Due to a series of unfortunate circumstances, like problems with my medication, changes with my insurance which meant I had to find a new orthopedic specialist. And I fell, no slid really, while doing some yard work. I take breaks more frequently due to my back and hip issues, so I decided to sit down on one of the many large boulders in my yard. I misjudged and sat on the side of the boulder that sloped like a slide. And that’s exactly what I did, I slid right down to the ground below, and landed on my side. That shifted something in my spine, but nothing too worrying I thought. Until last week when I bent over to feed the cats, and fucked my back up.

ALL I DID WAS BEND OVER TO FEED THE CATS!

Getting older is fabulous, until it isn’t.

As I write this I can see a pair of mated red tailed hawks catching the updraft from the canyon to soar high in the sky. Occasionally one will wobble in the air a bit, readjusting for maximum efficiency, letting the air do the heavy lifting. I thought, “Of course they wobble! The only thing supporting them is the air!” Which made me laugh because I have the solid ground to support me and I still wobble!

I say all this you because I just haven’t been able to write. My brain is just overwhelmed with anxiety and doubt and sadness and anger in response to this new, yet not new, flood of pain. And maybe the muscle relaxers and CBD and anti-inflammatories I’m popping are contributing to the fog a bit. Maybe.

So instead I’ll share some pretty pictures of my garden with you.

This artichoke plant comes back every year and instead of eating them I let them bloom. They are the most gorgeous purple flowers.

Newly planted California Poppies

Ornamental Garlic Blossoms

Icelandic Poppy with pod sitting on top for some reason and a little bug inside

First tiny flower on South African succulent who’s name I forgot

My cat thinks if she sits right by a gopher hole she can catch it, and if she sits under the bird feeder a bird will just fly into her mouth. Note the angry squirrel on the fence who wants to eat the birdseed my cat is sitting on.

I hope you enjoyed my iPhone garden photography. When life is throwing shit at me I always have my garden to balance me out, calm me down and help me breath. Even if all I can do is sit and watch nature do her thing.